Do you ever think about what you want your legacy to be?  What do you want people to remember about you in generations to come?  More importantly, what do you want your family to remember about you?  Do you have traditions you would like them to uphold, like your famous sweet potato pie recipe?  As the older generations in my family begin to pass away, I am left wondering what they would want me to pass on about them.  And, as I look to the future, I can decide what example and legacy I will leave for my children. 

Motherhood is an especially important part of my legacy.  The excitement that comes with becoming a mother for the first time, or any time, can be exhilarating!  While this precious life is growing inside of our wombs, we are filled with wonder and dream about who this little person will become.  We ponder what type of personality they will have and who they will resemble.  We may also envision what it looks like to be the perfect mom. You know, the type of mom who always has the right words to say, keeps calm in all situations, is always 100% attentive, and is surely never tired. Although she does not truly exist in the real world, to our children we hold that position even with all of our imperfections.  

Sometimes as we embark upon this adventure of motherhood, we tell ourselves all the things that we will do differently from the previous generations in our family.  Maybe, it is something as simple as the decision to use a pacifier or to delay screen time.  Maybe, it is something a little more serious, like the decision of whether to work outside of the home or not.  Change can be good, but I am learning that it is important to ask, “why?”. 

Why do you want to do things differently?  Why do you want to break away from past traditions? Were they bad or simply different? Do they seem archaic and irrelevant?  Is it to be more independent and choose a different path for your family?  Is it to break free from generational curses?  Is it to follow a current trend that seems more holistic?  

As the elder members of my family have begun to pass away, I feel the loss of their presence and wisdom deeply.  I regret not having asked more questions and sought to understand the reasons why they did things the way that they did.  I wish that I had taken more opportunity to record their thoughts, aspirations, and experiences.  In the busyness of my life as a mom homeschooling 7 kiddos, I would tell myself I just do not have the time. But now, I realize that time is of the essence because each day is truly a gift.  Our parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents carry with them experiences that seem like they were from another time; a time and history that is becoming lost.  Were it not for me asking my grandma questions, I may never have heard stories of her 5 homebirths.  If I had never heard those stories, I may never have experienced 6 beautiful homebirths of my own.  I am honored to be able to carry on that legacy.  I feel more connected with her, even though she is no longer physically with me.  

As I reflect on the wisdom that has left this earth with my elders, I also reflect on what my legacy is and the wisdom that I have to offer.  Each day we make so many decisions with our children in mind.  Sometimes just getting through the day is overwhelming.  But in our day-to-day activities, we can sprinkle in bits of the past by the things that we teach our children and the traditions that we pass on. There are traditions that I am setting now for my children that I hope they will choose to carry on for generations to come.  What will your legacy be?  Do you hope that your children will pass it on? I would love to hear your thoughts.