“Don’t worry; once the baby comes and you start nursing, all that weight will fall right off!”

Does this sound familiar to you? I can’t tell you how many times I was told this before my daughter was born, and it brought me a great sense of relief as I battled internally with the fact that my pregnancy had earned me an extra 50lbs.

Within the first few hours after she was born via c-section, I lost about 15lbs between my daughter’s weight, placenta, blood, fluids, etc. I got home a few days later ready to start seeing all that extra flab start to fall off. It didn’t bother me in my abdomen – I was gracious with myself there because I had just had major abdominal surgery. It really bothered me in my face, arms, and legs. I hated the way I looked and felt, and I was truly optimistic that nursing my daughter would take care of that in a flash.

If you search the internet for “weight loss while nursing”, you’ll find dozens of highly credible hits explaining why you might lose weight during nursing, how you can safely do it, and what to expect. But, if you search the internet for “weight gain during nursing”, you’ll find very little. 

I was devastated when I saw the scale ticking back up again while I was breastfeeding and couldn’t figure out why. I tried to look at patterns between when and how much I would eat and what types of food I was eating while nursing and during my pregnancy, and the common denominator was astounding to me. When I was pregnant, I was insatiably hungry at all times. There was a baby growing inside me and it was cute, right? Especially during my first trimester when I was so sick, all I could manage to eat were Goldfish and Starburst (it’s a wonder I passed the glucose test). 

Wouldn’t you know it, when I was nursing, I was insatiably hungry at all times – there was a baby growing outside of me. Less cute, though (me, not baby). I had dreams about mile-high club sandwiches.

It’s very, very common to lose weight during nursing. La Leche League reports that nursing mothers can safely lose about 1lb per week once cleared by their doctor to begin dieting. What’s shocking about this is that most doctors seem to say that losing about 1lb per week is a healthy amount of weight loss for a normal, non-nursing person. That the standard is the same for a mother feeding a growing baby is beyond me. 

Instead of promoting the idea that weight loss is necessary, easy, and common during breastfeeding, can we set ourselves up for better success, emotional health, and self-contentment by talking about healthy eating habits, healthy foods, healthy babies, and healthy moms? I would love to see more reputable resources talking about weight gain and healthy nourishment during nursing.

Once I realized that I was gaining weight because breastfeeding required a massive increase in calories, I set myself free to eat those extra calories and love my body anyway. I decided that if weight loss was still something that would be a healthy way to treat my body after I finished nursing, I would deal with it then. I did, and that weight has gone, but it’s taken over two years and I’ve had to learn a great deal more about the person in the mirror and the person my baby sees instead of the person standing on the scale looking down at a number. 

Weight loss takes time, and so does accepting your new body. Give yourself grace and time for both of those big tasks. Talk to a doctor and a nutritionist before you start on a fad or elimination diet. If you are feeling down on yourself, one of the best and most therapeutic things you can do for yourself is to get outside and move that hardworking body of yours. It might be worth the work to lose some weight down the road, but learning to love the new “mother” part of your identity is far more important.